A Day to Remember
by
Marlon Weaver
Memorial Day is observed on Monday, May 31, 2010. This day provides the opportunity to remember the sacrifices made by many to protect our country. Many college students in Maine have answered the call of freedom and are now facing some obstacles that seem invisible but have a very visible impact on their personal life.
I never really understood freedom and a true love for my country until I wore the uniform. I’m proud of it, and want to contribute any way that I can to encourage other student soldiers and veterans to seek help if they need it, and find positive outlets to focus on.
My name is Marlon Weaver and I am one of the growing number of Maine student veterans who battle with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).
PTSD presents new challenges and painful limitations in my life, but I have determined to use writing as a positive outlet against depression and PTSD. I enlisted in the Maine Army National Guard in 2002 and was deployed to Kuwait and Iraq in 2003 with the 1136th Transportation Co. during Operation Enduring Freedom and Operation Iraqi Freedom.
The war overseas affects everyone differently, for me, since being home, sudden noises and crowds disturbed me, I was easily agitated, angry and often withdrawn and depressed. I did not want to talk about my emotions and my close friends and family noticed the difference. I would experience horrible nightmares, which caused me to wake up punching the pillow or walls, and there would be embarrassing episodes of incontinence. There was an instance when my daughter came to wake me up, and I was so scared that I knocked her to the floor because I did not recognize her.
I knew then that I needed to get help.
The VA Hospital welcomed me and now provides me with medicines and counseling that helps to combat Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. While at the VA, a nurse explained that her husband, a disabled veteran who has PTSD, found one positive outlet and focused on it, she suggested that I do the same.
With this in mind, I have been writing stories, poetry, songs, anecdotes, articles, and quotes as an outlet during moments of sleeplessness or depression. Many of these pieces are blogs on social networks like MySpace and Facebook. Readers have commented on how these pieces are an inspiration for Maine veterans and their families who are dealing with PTSD and other disabilities resulting from military service and combat.
I am currently attending the New England School of Communications with help from the VA’s Vocational Rehabilitation Program. At NESCom, I am learning the skills necessary to earn a degree in Radio Broadcasting. Journalism instructor, Anne Gabbianelli O’Reilly has become a tremendous influence in my life.
She has inspired and encouraged me to have some of my articles published in The Weekly and The Bangor Daily News. She sent me this response to some of my articles by email.
“I’m most impressed with your writing and very moved by the spirit that shines through your words. I can only hope this will inspire others, not only in embracing life and its turmoil, but by inspiring us all to live the messages your writing offers.”
I work very hard every day to overcome PTSD. I still have moments when I get discouraged, but my faith in God and the support of my family and friends give me the courage to stay focused.
This gave me the courage to open up and provide an intimate view about PTSD in my life in “Bruh Man,” a story submitted to EMCC literary magazine, “The Eyrie” and “Crosscut” of Husson, which read,
“…No matter how slow he moves, he can be seen all over the city… Everyone in this city knows who he is…Living off the land and dining in garbage cans, who ever thought their little boy would grow up to be that kind of man…Enjoy your day and please don’t
feel bad, but think about the US citizens whose mind is still in Baghdad…”
John Goldfine, creative writing instructor for Eastern Maine Community College, added this comment to, “Impact,” a personal story, submitted as a blog detailing my overseas vehicle collision.
“When I get something as clean…as this, I hate to see it just sit on a course website without any further literary life…”
Many soldiers and student veterans still want to serve their country despite the negative effects of PTSD. This battle may be invisible to some but the effects can at times be seen by everyone.
Memorial Day in Maine will consist of parades, picnics, and pictures to honor those citizens, soldiers, and students that serve our country. As we remember this day, let’s recognize their battles may not be over.
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